When you run out of toilet paper....... ruh oh

[hawgrider]

So when you run out of toilet paper what are you going to wipe mr winky with?


“Lamb’s Ear”





The leaves of this plant are about 4 inches by 2 inches, and very soft and fuzzy, making for a very good tissue with excellent cleaning properties.

I mean, really, just how much room do you have to store hundreds of rolls of toilet paper? If the SHTF, I doubt if a lot of toilet paper will still be manufactured, and storing enough to last you for the rest of your life is impractical at best. http://modernsurvivalblog.com/preps/sustainable-toilet-paper/

[1moretoy]

So when you run out of toilet paper what are you going to wipe mr winky with?


“Lamb’s Ear”

Mr. Winky doesn't get wiped...shaken but not wiped.

[hawgrider]

Mr. Winky doesn't get wiped...shaken but not wiped.Naw thats Mr willy not Mr winky LOL

[Inor]

Mr. Winky doesn't get wiped...shaken but not wiped.

This conversation just took a dramatic turn for the worse! :shocked:

[Sparkyprep]

Cloth. Then wash, and re-use. It's gross, but it's the best long term option

[James m]

Long term I vote cloth too. A wash cloth. How do you wash your but in the shower anyway?

And what do you think about when you poop?

[OSFG]

depends on who I am advising...cloth for those I like....sand or bark for those I don't. I know for a fact that Afghani's use rocks even when toilet paper is right there in front of them. SO I looked for pumice to spread around all the porta johns and out houses. around our camps where they worked.

[Jeep]

Awesome

[Pauls]

Cloth has worked for centuries, I see no reason to use a plant when cloth is available.

Note: Poison ivy has nice soft, fuzzy leaves too. It is easier to use a cloth and keep it clean than it is to run out and find a proper leaf when you gotta go.

[Jeep]

Whats the rule for plants, leafs of 3 leave it be.

[Montana Rancher]

A serious question, and one that you should spend some time and money on.

As I have thought about this crap for many years (pun intended), I have a HUGE backstock of toilet paper, but it is mostly for barter as I plan on using my other backstock of Bidet's.

http://www.amazon.com/Blue-Bidet-BB-20-Portable/dp/B004IW5ITO/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1420785299&sr=8-1&keywords=personal+hygiene+refresher

Similar to that one, as it advertises, small, light weight, and go anywhere.

I have used leaves in the past, trust me this is better.

[bigwheel]

So when you run out of toilet paper what are you going to wipe mr winky with?


“Lamb’s Ear”

Well back in the good old days the scout master claimed all the outhouses came equipped with corn cobs. It normally take three to get the job done. You use a red one..then a white one to see if you needed to use another red one..lol. Now the po'folks who did not live in corn growing country was forced into using the big Sears Catalog. That come in handy to give some reading material while a person was waiting on nature to take its course. One peculiar aspect of that strategy was supposedly the pics of the ladies in the sexy underwear was always the last pages to be used. I guess the ladies saved those to pick out Christmas gifts or something..hmmm.

[Deebo]

At one dollar for a four pack, I Will continue to buy t.p.
When this next move is complete, I will be able to stock More.

[OSFG]

I think ... the Bidet...if I have an adequate water source...this is how I will take care of it...along with a fresh supply of cloth...or hand soap....

[Slippy]

Who needs TP?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pARH-jsRt3U

[Inor]

Who needs TP?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pARH-jsRt3U

That could be ugly if you just ate a meal of White Castles!

[SquirrelBait]

Who needs TP?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pARH-jsRt3U

That looks a little too close to pounding sand for my comfort...

[Montana Rancher]

Ok, so if you don't bother buying a $10 item to squirt your bunger clean, the 2nd best method I have heard of is a bleach bucket next to the toilet and some "absorbent cloths" and you do the wipe thing and put it in the bleach water.

A lot more messy but for those that need physical extraction that is probably the best SHTF alternative.

P.S. The dollar store is gonna close, this is for real preps.

[Jerry D Young]

TP replacements: red shop towels or custom personal marked/colored cloth squares, stainless steel step can, Fels-Naptha clothes washing soap or liquid cold water detergent, bleach, 2 steel stock pots (washing & rinsing), stainless steel tongs (washing & rinsing), 2 Mobile washer plungers (kept labeled) (washing & rinsing)( Mobile Washer hand clothes washer:
http://beprepared.com/mobile-washer-hand-operated-washing-machine.html
), air dry in sun for additional sanitizing.

These items will allow for the use of individual personal wipe cloths and cloth diapers. Wash them, rinse them, wring them, and hang them in the sun for final sanitation. Keep things separate for each stage.

Just my opinion.

[Pauls]

I have a stainless steel scrubber...


It's a lot like what the dog does when they drag theit butt on the ground, but it removes hemeroids at the same time.

[Ginger]

Mr. Winky?!!! lol

[hawgrider]

Mr. Winky?!!! lol
Yup Mr winky the turd cutter.:gasmask:

[shootbrownelk]

A recent poll says 9 out of 10 ragheads prefer their left hand.

[Montana Rancher]

A recent poll says 9 out of 10 ragheads prefer their left hand.

Finally some real knowledge, I didn't know that, it could be useful rather than the turd jokes going around.

[Pauls]

Yep, if they live by sharia law then the removal of their right hand will make them starve to death. (unless they have a wife or slave to feed them)

[OSFG]

A recent poll says 9 out of 10 ragheads prefer their left hand.

It is culturally why they only shake with there right hand. But that is also the hand they wipe the crap off the left one with using only sand and water. It's also why they smell like crap and why I never let them put their filthy hands on me.

[RWalls]

A bear was taking a dump in the forest when a rabbit walked by. The bear said, "Hey rabbit, does shit stick to your fur?"

"No," replied the rabbit.

The bear picked up the rabbit and wiped his ass with him.

[OSFG]

I find it perversely fascinating that an ass wiping thread has persisted for so long...i mean there are only so many ways to accomplish said task...wipe, wash, or wear it.

[Inor]

I am still trying to figure out PaulS' stainless steel asshole scrubber. That sounds like some medieval torture device!

[OSFG]

I am still trying to figure out PaulS' stainless steel asshole scrubber. That sounds like some medieval torture device!
again..flabbergasted.

[bigwheel]

I find it perversely fascinating that an ass wiping thread has persisted for so long...i mean there are only so many ways to accomplish said task...wipe, wash, or wear it.

Thanks for the astute observations on that Sir. It did seem to be getting a bit kinky. To recall back in boy scouts some of the guys preferred to cleanse with poison ivy. hmm

[Montana Rancher]

Ok so bottom line.... snicker

If you are planning on wiping it with some store bought paper, just google "Venezuela Toilet Paper Shortage" and then figure something else out. When you are on a "prepper" type post please do not make me sick by saying you will "buy" something, the whole point is the system breaks down and you will have to wipe your arses with what you have.

[Arklatex]

Save your phone books. I also like the cloth idea. Not so sure about the bidets, especially when combined with a diet heavily loaded in rice and beans...

[Baglady]

I am still trying to figure out PaulS' stainless steel asshole scrubber. That sounds like some medieval torture device!Me too!

[Pauls]

Check out the stainless steel scrubbers at your local grocery store - you will find them close to the dish soap. Yes, it would be a lot like a midieval torture device... but it would get rid of hemorrhoids.

[Inor]

Check out the stainless steel scrubbers at your local grocery store - you will find them close to the dish soap. Yes, it would be a lot like a midieval torture device... but it would get rid of hemorrhoids.

Knock yourself out there buddy! Let us know how it works. I think I am going to keep looking for less severe options.

[Reptilicus]

Tree bark should also work, I quess, better than nothing!!! Would probably eliminate the hemorrhoids also!!

[Pauls]

I have reconsidered my position on the scrubbers - they will be reserved for "honored guests". :)

[Sparkyprep]

Beats pine cones!